Moving Past Feelings

So, yesterday I had a post titled Nonsense where I 'went off' about my money frustrations.

I have really been having a rough time with the Lord. There are times where I really believe he does not love me and really dislikes me. As bad things happen in my life, daily, I feel that more and more.

How fitting that yesterday, I would receive an email from Joyce Meyer Ministries for her new book Living Beyond Your Feelings. Seems fitting, right? I can get the book with a donation of any amount. I casually thought about it and put it in the back of my head.

Today, the morning did NOT start off well leading me to once again, feel disliked by the Lord.

I DVR Joyce Meyer every day. When Luke left and all through the accident ordeal, I listened/watched to Joyce at least once a day....sometimes more than that. As of late, I have not been watching and I also have not been reading my Bible as much....church? Yeah....haven't been in a few weeks.

I'm not saying bad things are happening because of this, but it definitely affects my attitude.

Today, Emily was watching a show and I had two things that were going to be DVR'd at the same time, which meant, I had to change the channel or cancel a show. I tried to cancel Joyce. Wouldn't work. Channel flipped. Thank God it did. I REALLY needed the message.

Go deeper with God.
Be honest with Him.
If you hate what he wants you to do, are tired of the way you're being treated, sick of your circumstances and worn out, tell him, then, do it anyway.
Even if you've done it over and over again, listen to Him.

Luke 5
4 When he had finished speaking, he said to Simon, “Put out into deep water, and let down the nets for a catch.”

5 Simon answered, “Master, we’ve worked hard all night and haven’t caught anything. But because you say so, I will let down the nets.”

6 When they had done so, they caught such a large number of fish that their nets began to break. 7 So they signaled their partners in the other boat to come and help them, and they came and filled both boats so full that they began to sink.

Now, I need his help to go forward.

Psalm 38

⁸I am faint and sorely bruised [deadly cold and quite worn out]; I groan by reason of the disquiet and moaning of my heart.
    ⁹Lord, all my desire is before You; and my sighing is not hidden from You.
    ¹⁰My heart throbs, my strength fails me; as for the light of my eyes, it also is gone from me.
    ¹¹My lovers and my friends stand aloof from my plague; and my neighbors and my near ones stand afar off.
    ¹²They also that seek and demand my life lay snares for me, and they that seek and require my hurt speak crafty and mischievous things; they meditate treachery and deceit all the day long.
    ¹³But I, like a deaf man, hear not; and I am like a dumb man who opens not his mouth.
    ¹⁴Yes, I have become like a man who hears not, in whose mouth are no arguments or replies.
    ¹⁵For in You, O Lord, do I hope; You will answer, O Lord my God.
    ¹⁶For I pray, Let them not rejoice over me, who when my foot slips boast against me.
    ¹⁷For I am ready to halt and fall; my pain and sorrow are continually before me.
    ¹⁸For I do confess my guilt and iniquity; I am filled with sorrow for my sin.
    ¹⁹But my enemies are vigorous and strong, and those who hate me wrongfully are multiplied.
    ²⁰They also that render evil for good are adversaries to me, because I follow the thing that is good.
    ²¹Forsake me not, O Lord; O my God, be not far from me.
    ²²Make haste to help me, O Lord, my Salvation.